"Power of Moms"

Ironically I was invited (by two women I adore) to join a group last month. Now, I know that this goes against my desire to not be associated with any one clique or group but after much thought I decided that to decline this invitation would be declining the opportunity to improve my family life and mothering abilities. And so, with this thought in mind I went to my first group meeting since Girl Scouts and Leadership in high school (we just won't mention exactly how long ago that was). Guess what...?...I did not die and to the contrary I actually enjoyed myself.

We are a Learning Circle of the larger group under the direction of The Power of Moms. We are given an article that has questions and topic discussions and we meet once a month to talk about it all and learn from each other. So along with my whole accountability need, I am going to, monthly answer the questions and tell you all what I am going to work on. I will not be sharing the article or questions as I think that is a breach in the copyright, but if you are interested you may follow the links I have provided or find some cool articles and just do it all on your own (I knew I would never actually do it or find the time to do it so this is my option). Any ideas and suggestions from you would be loved as always.

(1) My gauge of success right now is the following: my children are fed, alive, and semi happy at the end of the day, my hubbie is likewise fed and happy, I have taken a shower, cleaned something in my house, ate, and am semi happy as well. Small and pety...?...perhaspe but doable and attained! As life success I want my family to have a knowledge and love of The Gospel of Jesus Christ and I want us to follow the commandments of God. I want to maintain a happy and healthy marriage. Like wise I want us to be a loving and caring family. Success means that we have a dwelling to live in and enough food on the table for us to survive and enjoy. I think that if when I die these things have been fulfilled to best of my ability then I have had a successful life.

(2) I am not a victim and have never really felt like one. I know that I have chosen to be a mother and although I did not fully understand all that I was saying yes to, I in no way regret my decision. My problem then, is not feeling like a victim to the life I am leading but trying not to react to influences that are beyond my control. I am a stubborn fighter and I know it. I need to learn to control those urges when 'things' happen and let somethings go.

(3) Unrealistic expectations are a disease of self-confidence. I have three children 5 and under, for me this can be a lot at times. Here are my top 5 unrealistic expectations that I place on myself pretty regularly (in black) and a more realistic version (in red).
a) my children will behave and not complain while doing chores: accomplish 3 chores per day regardless
b) I can start and finish an art project (of any variety) to the level of wonderfulness that I want it to be on any given day that I feel so inspired (which is almost daily - note the problem?): limit myself to 1 project per week
c) I should go to bed every night feeling amazingly happy : write in my Gratitude book every night after reading Scriptures
d) we should have enough money for the essentials and the fun we want to have: ?
e) I should lose 35 pounds to get back to my marriage weight: lose 1-5 pounds per month by limiting the number of cokes I drink and working out more

(4) I need more gratitude in my life. The more that I give thanks the more I find to give thanks for. This is one of my focuses this month.

(5) So this question is about in what areas of your life can you be less than perfect or be satisfied with mediocrity, I don't think I have a problem here. I made a New Years Resolution two years ago that I would spend more time playing on the floor with my girls than I would cleaning it. Wow, that was a great resolution that I have continued to live. I think I could let go of others perception on me and the 'awards' (good or bad) that I feel those should bring. I want to be satisfied with being mediocre to the world and fabulous to my family.

(6) I want to become Fulfilled by my life.
I want to become more Intelligent in the Holistic atmosphere of life.
I want to become more Active.

(7) My voices need to stop telling me that I look like a mom who has given up on herself for the benefit of her family, because in reality it does not benefit them at all. My mood and attitude have a huge impact on my family and the life that we lead, if it sucks then I should not be surprised that my family 'life' feels sucky too! My voices need to stop telling me that I need recognition from the world to feel important and desirable (in many areas of my life, not sexually). My voices need to stop telling me that we will not make it out of our money crunch. We are following the counsel of our living Prophet and the Spirit and working our tails off to be debt free (school, work, house, and stupid stuff!) and that is a good thing. Yes, it is awful and hard and drags us down but, in the end we will be liberated by our success!

(8) Funny, it's been about an hour and I can still not think of something that I will cut out or not do this month. I have been purging myself of 'things' as of late and so I feel that need has been meet.

(9) This month I will spend some money on an activity for Gary & I to do together. We 'date' with our favorite show and a homemade milkshake from time to time but we need to really go out and have a night where we can talk and relax and play for longer than an hour.

So there it is. I'll post a "Power of Moms" monthly.